A lesson · Two Lanterns
Grade 3-5Two Lanterns
Your friend’s family does things differently on Sundays, and you can be curious instead of correcting, because God lights every lantern.
Assumptions & Caveats
Before you begin
What you should know
At this age kids are starting to notice that other families do things differently (what they eat, when they pray, what they call God, whether they go anywhere on Sundays), and they’re right at the edge of being able to compare two systems side by side. They also sometimes hear “different” as “wrong” or “wrong” as “different,” on both sides. This lesson gives them one picture to hold: God lights every lantern, so we don’t have to fix anyone else’s. Keep it concrete and in pairs, and leave the big abstract questions for older groups. There’s nothing you need to prepare beyond paper and something to draw with.
What we're assuming
- The room likely holds several faith backgrounds, including kids who don’t go anywhere on weekends. Never assume everyone shares your words for God or a shared way of praying.
- Some kids may have been told, by someone they love, that their way is the only right way, or may have been teased for theirs. Don’t ask anyone to say which.
- No one has to share out loud. Drawing and pairing up are complete participation.
Learning goals
What they walk away with
- Leaves with a picture they can hold: each person has their own lantern, and God is the one who lights it.
- Feels what it’s like to be curious about a friend’s way of praying instead of correcting it.
- Has one simple question to ask themselves: “Am I sharing, or am I trying to get my friend to do it back?”
- Knows that if a friend is hurt or scared, getting a grown-up is always okay and always kind.
How to hold the room
Before you start talking
- Keep your own tone light and curious. If a kid says “that’s wrong,” don’t correct them hard. Ask, “Tell me more about what you noticed.”
- Never ask a child to explain or defend their family’s faith. Offer, don’t require.
- If someone says “my way is right and theirs is wrong,” treat it as honest, not as a problem. This lesson is for exactly that moment. Say, “A lot of people feel that way sometimes. Let’s try something.”
- Any activity can be passed on. Sitting and watching is still taking part.
The lesson flow
Step by step
Each beat alternates a little input, a little doing, and a little reflecting. Skip, slow down, or stretch any of these to fit your group.
Two sleepovers
Read these two short scenes aloud, one at a time. Stop after each and ask for a thumbs up, sideways, or down: “Has anything like this ever happened to you or someone you know?”
Scene one: Maya sleeps over at Jonah’s house. At dinner, Jonah’s family sits quietly for a moment before eating, and then they eat. Maya’s family says a prayer out loud before every meal. Maya wonders if Jonah’s family forgot.
Scene two: Jonah’s friend Dev invites him to come to a Sunday school Dev loves. Jonah’s family does something else on Sundays. Dev feels bad. He wants Jonah to like it too, and he keeps asking.
Ask lightly: “What do you think Maya might feel? What do you think Dev might feel?” Take one or two answers, no more.
The lantern
Tell the lantern story in your own words. Hold up a flashlight, a candle (unlit is fine), or just your hands cupped like a lantern. Here’s a path through it: “A long time ago, someone wrote a song that said, ‘You will light my candle, God. You will help me see when it’s dark.’ Notice who lights it. The person didn’t light their own candle, and no friend lit it for them. God did.” Read Psalms 18:28 aloud.
Then: “Here’s something else the Bible says. God said, ‘I girded thee, though thou hast not known me.’ (Isaiah 45:5.) That means God was already with a person even before they knew it. Even a person who prays in a totally different way, or doesn’t pray out loud at all. God was already there.”
Give two choices, with a gesture for each. “Fixing” (pointing finger) means trying to change what my friend does. “Shining” (open hands) means showing what I love and letting my friend be them. Ask the pairs to decide which one Maya could do, and which one Dev could do. Let them act out a short version if they want.
Two lanterns
Everyone draws a lantern on paper, big. Inside it, they draw or write things that feel like their light: how they pray or think about God, what they love about it, a word they use, a place they go, or just a feeling. It can be as plain as “quiet” or “singing.” Passing is fine; a blank lantern is a lantern.
Pair up. Partners trade lanterns. Each partner looks and says one thing: “I noticed...” or “I’m curious about...” Not “that’s good” or “that’s weird.” Then they hand it back. Ask them to notice: Did you need your partner to change their lantern? Did they need you to change yours? No answers out loud needed, just the noticing.
One question, one rule
Tell them two simple things.
A question to carry: “Am I sharing, or am I trying to get my friend to do it back?” Sharing is telling what I love and being happy either way.
A rule that’s always okay: “If a friend is hurt, or scared, or in danger, I get a grown-up I trust. That’s not about whose lantern is right. That’s just taking care of each other.” Say it plainly and don’t dress it up. Then hand out the wallet card and let them take it home.
Don’t add a closing moral. Let the lanterns stand.
What you'll need
The materials
- Paper and something to draw with (crayons, markers, or pencils)
- Optional: a flashlight or candle to hold up (an unlit candle works)
- This lesson’s printable wallet card, “God Lights Every Candle” — two print side by side on one sheet for cutting apart.
If it's not going well
When this one gets heavy
Silence is fine; this age often draws better than it talks. Pushback (“but my religion is the right one!”) is welcome, not a problem: “That makes sense. You can love yours and still be curious about your friend’s.” A strong emotional reaction (a kid who looks upset, or says someone told them they’re wrong or going to hell) calls for a pause, a quiet word one-on-one, and no pressure to explain. A disclosure of real harm, something far beyond a disagreement about how to pray, should not be worked through in the room. Stay warm, receive it (“thank you for telling me, I take that seriously”), and follow the site’s mentor safety guidelines along with your own local mandatory-reporting obligations.
For the fuller tiered guidance — including what to do if someone discloses something serious — see For Mentors.
Help this get better
Teaching this to a group we haven't planned for?
Tell us — this only gets better with your eyes on it. We read every one of these.